5 Things to Say When a Top Performer Is Spinning Out Under Pressure
Under pressure, even your highest-capacity people can lose sight of their strengths. Stress narrows cognitive bandwidth, making everything feel bigger, heavier, and more complex than it actually is.
Research from Stanford shows that high achievers under duress often hyper-focus on what's not working, creating a cognitive loop that reinforces overwhelm.
Your job as a senior leader is to interrupt that loop. The fastest way to do that is through intentional language that expands their perspective and reconnects them to what is working, what is in motion, and where the real challenge actually sits.
Here are five things to say that immediately ground a top performer and move them back into constructive action.
1. “Before we talk about anything else—tell me what is working right now.”
This shifts their brain out of threat mode and reactivates competence pathways. Naming wins, traction, or progress reopens problem-solving capacity and reduces the sense of collapse.
2. “You’ve navigated a lot recently—what have you done that has helped you stay steady?”
This is a powerful reframing tool. Instead of focusing on where they’re slipping, it helps them identify the actions, mindsets, or habits that are already supporting them. It builds momentum from strength, not deficit.
3. “What’s the biggest challenge for you right now—the one thing that’s making everything else feel heavier?”
Pressure often creates a blurred, tangled sense of “everything is hard.” Helping them identify the one primary challenge reduces cognitive load and clarifies where you can meaningfully intervene.
4. “How can I support you—and what support do you need from the team?”
Top performers rarely ask for help on their own. This invites partnership, signals that support is normal, and widens the container of resources beyond you alone. Sometimes the best support is clarity, removing a blocker, or reprioritizing—not adding more hands.
5. “Let’s align on the next right step—and I’ll walk with you until you’re back in your groove.”
This brings direction and presence. Top performers don’t need rescuing—they need clarity, momentum, and to know they’re not carrying the weight alone. Closing with commitment reduces isolation and re-establishes stability.
When you intentionally help someone reconnect to what’s working, articulate their biggest constraint, and access support, you help them re-enter their peak performance zone faster.
This approach doesn’t just reduce overwhelm—it builds psychological safety and strengthens the relationship between leader and top performer.
If your leadership team is feeling the weight of disruption, we can help.
Leadership Practice
Strengths-First Reset Conversation
Identify one top performer who seems stretched thin. Use this short five-step conversation to help them re-ground:
Start with strengths: “What’s working right now?”
Surface self-support: “What’s helped you stay steady?”
Clarify the core challenge: Identify the single biggest constraint.
Offer targeted support: Ask what you and/or the team can take off their plate or help accelerate.
Align on next steps: Co-create one clear action and close with commitment.
You’ll create immediate relief, clearer priorities, and a renewed sense of partnership.
Author
Athena Williams, Founder and CEO of Tenacious Leadership Institute, has been supporting leaders worldwide to become more tenacious for over 20 years. She has found that tenacity is the key to sustained leadership success in today’s ever-changing world. Through her coaching and leadership development programs, she helps leaders expertly handle change, complexity and other challenges so they can quickly get better results for themselves, their teams and their organizations.
Take the first step to becoming a tenacious leader by scheduling a call with us.
